Have you ever noticed how eating well and moving your body can feel almost effortless during some periods of life, while at other times it feels nearly impossible? I have asked myself that question many times over the years. As a physiotherapist, I had spent years studying health, movement and the human body. I understood what a balanced diet looked like, I knew how powerful movement could be for both my physical and mental health, and I knew the importance of a good rest. Yet there were still times when I wasn’t choosing what truly supported my own wellbeing.
During my studies at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition (IIN), I came across this question that has stayed with me ever since:
What is feeding your life?
That question introduced me to the concepts of Primary and Secondary Foods. Primary food refers to everything that nourishes us beyond the food on our plate, while secondary food refers to what we eat. Primary food includes our relationships, career, physical activity, finances, home environment, creativity, spirituality, joy, education, social life, our physical surroundings and our overall health. The food we eat is what IIN refers to as Secondary Food. At first glance, this may sound like common sense. Most of us know that stress affects our eating habits. But knowing something intellectually and recognizing it in our own lives are often two very different things.
The concepts of Primary and Secondary Foods were developed by the Institute for Integrative Nutrition as a coaching framework. While the framework itself isn’t a scientific model, the areas it explores, such as stress, relationships, sleep, purpose and social connection, are all supported by decades of research.
The choices we make every day are rarely made in isolation. They are influenced by our relationships, our sleep, our stress levels, our confidence, our workload and the seasons of life we are living through. In other words, they are influenced by our Primary food. When the areas of Primary food feel balanced, taking care of ourselves often becomes easier. There is nothing wrong with ordering a takeaway, spending an evening on the sofa watching Netflix, or taking a break when you genuinely need one. You don’t have to do the right thing all the time and therefore the question is not whether these choices are right or wrong.
The more important question is this: Why am I making this choice today? Am I choosing it because it truly restores me, or because I feel stuck, overwhelmed, exhausted, or disconnected from myself?
For many women, lasting change doesn’t begin by forcing ourselves to make different choices. It begins by understanding why we make the choices we do. Once we understand the “why,” healthier choices often become a natural consequence rather than something we constantly must fight for.
Understanding Your “Why”
Once we begin asking ourselves why we make the choices we do, another question naturally follows: Why do you want to make a change? Every woman has her own story:
- For some, it begins after years of chronic stress.
- For others, it is the moment they realize emotional eating has become a way of coping.
- It may come after becoming a mother and constantly putting everyone else’s needs before their own.
- It may be during menopause, when the strategies that once worked no longer seem to work.
- It may begin with a diagnosis such as high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes or an autoimmune condition and the realization that medication alone cannot create the health you want.
Or perhaps the motivation is much simpler.
- You want more energy to play with your children.
- You want to feel comfortable in your own body again.
- You want to wake up with more energy than exhaustion.
Understanding why you want to change creates a very different starting point than simply following another diet or exercise plan. Your “why” gives your health journey purpose, and that is often what helps us create lasting change.
So Where Do We Begin?
Once you have identified your why for making a change, the next question becomes:
Where will that change have the greatest impact?
Rather than assuming everyone needs the same advice, we take time to understand your life as a whole. Together, we explore what is already supporting your wellbeing and what may be draining your energy.
Early in my studies at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, we were introduced to a coaching tool called the Circle of Life. At first, it seemed surprisingly simple. But each time I looked at it, something different stood out. Sometimes I realized that my marriage needed more attention, or I noticed that I hadn’t experienced much joy for weeks. It helped me see something I hadn’t noticed before.
The Circle of Life
The Circle of Life is a simple self-reflection tool built around the twelve areas of Primary Food. It isn’t a test, and there are no right or wrong answers. Instead, it offers an honest snapshot of where you are right now. It helps you discover where your attention is most needed. The goal is not to score perfectly in every area of your life. That’s neither realistic nor necessary. The goal is to learn where your life might be asking for more attention right now.
As you work through the different areas, ask yourself:
- Which parts of my life are nourishing me?
- Which areas feel depleted?
- Where could one small change create the greatest positive impact?
Sometimes the first step isn’t changing what you eat or how much you exercise but understanding yourself a little better. If you’d like to explore your own Circle of Life, I’d love to share with you the tool that I use in my coaching sessions.
When you subscribe to my newsletter, I’ll send you my complimentary Circle of Life Reflection Worksheet. It’s a simple but powerful exercise that can help you better understand where you are today, recognizing what’s already supporting your wellbeing and identify where small, meaningful changes could have the greatest impact.
I hope it helps you pause, reflect and begin to see your own health from a different perspective.
With care,
Rannveig
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